In addition to removing all sanctions, releasing frozen assets and providing Iran with a $300 billion development fund, it has now emerged that Donald Trump agreed to rename his youngest son ‘Barack’, as part of deal to end the war in Iran. Those analysing the deal say it appears to be quite lopsided in Iran’s […]
The post Barron Trump To Be Renamed ‘Barack’ as Part of Trump’s Surrender to Iran…
"Cuba has also agreed to open the Straight of Florida. Yes, it is already open. But under this deal, they have agreed to keep it open … for the next 60 days, and then they will start charging us to access it. So that’s a very, very big win for us"
The post Cuba Offers To Give Up Nuclear Weapons It’s Not Developing in Return for US$300B appeared first on The Shovel.
Long-time One Nation supporter Glen Beveridge says he was disappointed to hear Pauline Hanson’s pitch for a ‘monoculture’, arguing he was much more comfortable living without any culture at all.
The post Disillusioned One Nation Supporter Says Monoculture Is One Culture Too Many appeared first on The Shovel.
Owners of the small business News Corporation are applauding the Albanese government today, after it was announced they would receive carve-outs in the new CGT changes. In a dual announcement, the government declared small business owners would be exempt from the changes to the capital gains tax, and also that a “small business” now meant […]
The post Government Caves and Gives CGT Carve-Out for…
"Almost the entire ocean on Australia's west coast is Indian”
The post Pauline Hanson To Abolish Environment if Elected appeared first on The Shovel.
“He sort of just froze when the goal was scored, like his brain was buffering"
The post Man Who Supports One Nation and Socceroos Suffers Mental Breakdown After Former Refugee Scores World Cup Goal appeared first on The Shovel.
“All I've ever wanted is for someone to think I'm funny. Believe me, I’ve tried everything"
The post SpaceX IPO: Elon Musk Says Space Is “Final Frontier” in His Search for Friend appeared first on The Shovel.
"When Pauline said 'foreign-born,' I thought she meant, you know ..."
The post Indian-Born Malcolm Roberts Now Couch-Surfing, After One Nation Housing Policy Forces Him To Sell Home appeared first on The Shovel.
Following the Knicks’ narrow loss yesterday, every day New Yorker Donald Trump has decided to blow off some steam after the match by bombing Iran. As New York reacts to its beloved team’s loss in Finals Game 3, fans citywide are handling their emotions in a variety of ways, including one who decided to reignite […]
The post Knicks Fan Lets Off Steam by Bombing Iran appeared first on The Shovel.
“We’re going to find this Mexican and send him back immediately"
The post Trump to Deport El Niño appeared first on The Shovel.
Man of his word Barnaby Joyce, who would never so much even think of betraying a vow or going back on a promise, has spoken out against abortion, saying that women must follow through with the lifelong commitment of having a child. Speaking at an anti-abortion rally in Sydney on Tuesday evening, the Nationals-turned-One Nation […]
The post Bloke Who Can’t Commit to Wife or Party Reckons Women…
“I’ve just typed in a search for ‘nuclear submarines’ within a 15,000 km radius of Canberra"
The post Australia To Source Submarines From Facebook Marketplace, Under New AUKUS Agreement appeared first on The Shovel.
The new merged festival – to be named The Running of the Cheese – will involve several hundred participants being chased by enraged bulls down an almost-vertical hill while attempting to grab a 4-kilogram wheel of Double Gloucester cheese.
The post Pamplona and Gloucestershire To Combine Festivals for “Bulls Chasing Idiots Chasing a Cheese Wheel Down a Hill” appeared first on The Shovel.
Shocking footage from a US politician has compelled wildlife experts worldwide to send out a PSA today, urging the public not to try and pick up any wild RFK Jr’s that they find in their backyard. After footage showing the Secretary for Raw Milk and Jeans picking up a snake in his backyard went viral, […]
The post Snake Experts Warn Public Not To Try and Pick Up Wild RFK Jr appeared first on The…
Australia Post issued a statement reminding customers that they will never leave a parcel, and that the only way to know that it’s a genuine Australia Post delivery is to check your letterbox for a ‘Sorry We Missed You’ card.
The post Australia Post Issues Scam Warning: “If They Knock On Your Door, It’s Not Us” appeared first on The Shovel.
"While there are understandable concerns about abandoning the florin, I believe our supporters are ready for the change”
The post Tony Abbott Makes First Announcement as Liberal Party President, Backing Adoption of Decimal Currency appeared first on The Shovel.
Duration: 18:13
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“These people in Government have clearly never run a business, or more to the point, a holding company structured beneath a family trust with a corporate trustee"
The post Flotilla of Luxury Yachts Assembles off Kirribilli To Protest “Crippling” Capital Gains Tax Changes appeared first on The Shovel.
“Very powerful light, very beautiful light. Some people are saying it could go right through the body, right through the organs, and just clean the whole thing out"
The post Trump, RFK Jnr Unsure Whether To Treat Potential Ebola Outbreak With Really Powerful Light or Raw Milk appeared first on The Shovel.
“One of the central elements of being Australian is being able to identify a complex, multifaceted problem and then finding a creative way to blame it on brown people”.
The post Taylor Proposes New “Australian Values” Test Requiring Would-Be Migrants To Blame Current Migrants for Nation’s Problems appeared first on The Shovel.
"There's also the subtle suggestion that he might be about to explain why this is actually someone else’s responsibility. It is a stunning work"
The post Statue of Scott Morrison Not Holding a Hose Unveiled appeared first on The Shovel.
"Ordinary Australians may soon be forced to settle for owning only the house they actually live in"
The post Taylor Accuses Labor of Killing The Australian Dream of One Day Owning Someone Else’s Home appeared first on The Shovel.
“I had planned to just have a few investment properties to set me up for retirement, but I guess now I’ll be operating an offshore LNG platform instead”.
The post Huge Spike in Searches for ‘How Do I Become a Gas Company’ After Other Tax Loopholes Closed appeared first on The Shovel.
News outlets around the globe have unlocked a new productivity hack after discovering they can entirely republish their previous week’s coverage of the war in Iran without making any changes. As the stalemate between the US and Iran continues, President Trump has said he’ll blow Iran to smithereens if they don’t agree with his new […]
The post World’s Media Copy-Paste “Iran Peace Deal Fails”…
“People have had enough of the hand-out culture that’s taken over this country"
The post Hanson Arrives on Gina’s $2 Mil Private Plane To Claim “Victory for Ordinary Australians” appeared first on The Shovel.
Donald Trump says the US’s war with Iran will not end until the war has achieved its primary objective of allowing safe passage through a body of water which was closed due to the US’s war with Iran.
The post US Threatens To Keep Bombing Iran Until Access to Straight of Hormuz Returns to How It Was Before Us Started Bombing Iran appeared first on The Shovel.
Australian households will have to cut spending and pay more on their mortgages because an emotionally-stunted, validation-obsessed man-child 15,000 kilometres away wants to look tough.
The post Interest Rates Rise in Australia Because Some Fuckwit in America Wasn’t Hugged Enough as a Child appeared first on The Shovel.
With the news that Trump lawyer Rudy Giuliani was fighting for his life in hospital, family, friends and members from the administration have urgently called a meeting at what they thought was a high-end hotel but which turned out to be a landscaping business next to a sex shop in outer Philadelphia.
The post Supporters Gather at Four Seasons Total Landscaping To Pray for Rudy Giuliani appeared…
The luxury jet – nicknamed the Please XPlane – was due to make its maiden voyage this morning before being indefinitely delayed by what aviation officials are calling “a code Barnaby”.
The post Pauline’s New Plane Grounded Until Barnaby Regains Consciousness and Gets off the Wing appeared first on The Shovel.
“We wanted to create a travel document that uniquely reflects President Trump’s tastes and interests"
The post New Commemorative Trump Passports To Include Epstein Island Entry Visa appeared first on The Shovel.