You have ISTQB Foundation. ISTQB Advanced. Certified ScrumMaster. A cloud cert. A security testing cert. Maybe a Python for Testers badge from a platform.
And you still cannot write a test that finds a real bug.
I interviewed someone like you last quarter. The resume was a wall of acronyms. The conversation was a wall of theory. "I follow the V-model." "I use equivalence partitioning." "I…